(April 3, 2007) Hear the audio version
D: Molly, you’re a Giants fan.
M: Yeah, Mom.
D: So today’s Opening Day.
D: Back in the 60’s –
M: – the old days.
D: Right, the old days. San Francisco Giants fans knew who’d be on the team every year.
D: Mays, McCovey, Marichal, Cepeda, and an Alou –
M: – or two or three.
D: Right. But these days fans need a cheat sheet to know who’s on first.
M: Richie’s on first.
D: Rich Aurilia?
D: But Richie’s a shortstop.
M: Except when he’s on first. Omar’s at short, Ray-Ray’s on second, and Pedro’s at third.
D: Hey! I know them. This isn’t so hard –
M: – except when Klesko’s on first.
D: You said Richie was on first!
M: Except when Sweeney’s on first.
D: MAKE UP YOUR MIND, MOLLY! Who is on first?
M: Lance Niekro?
D: The Giants have FOUR first-basemen?
D: I don’t get it. It wasn’t that long ago when we needed only one first-baseman, the great J.T. Snow.
M: We HAVE J.T. Snow.
D: Then why do the Giants need anyone else on first???
M: J.T. retired, Mom. He’s a coach. And broadcaster.
D: Okay. Who’s in left?
D: Barry Bonds?
D: For one more year?
M: At least.
D: Okay . . . Who’s in center?
M: Dave Roberts.
D: The guy I call the jackrabbit, who ran around the bases for the Red Sox to come back against the Yankees in the ’04 playoffs? He’s a Giant now?
M: Yep, and he’s batting leadoff. He should get ON first a lot.
D: When he isn’t playing center.
D: I like it. Who’s in right?
M: Randy Winn.
D: But he’s a center-fielder.
M: Roberts is in center. Winn’s in right.
D: Who’s pitching?
D: You said Barry was in left!
M: Barry BONDS is in left, Barry ZITO is on the mound.
D: Barry Zito the A’s pitcher?
M: No, Barry Zito the Giants’ pitcher.
D: He left the A’s –
M: – and signed with the Giants.
D: Good! So who else’s gonna help the Giants win games this year?
M: LOTS of guys: Matt Cain –
D: – who’s your sister’s age.
M: Yep. And Noah Lowry and Bengie Molina and Todd Linden and Kevin Frandsen.
D: Got it. I hate to ask this, but . . . any of them play first?
D: So who’s on first?
M: Kevin. When it’s not Richie or Ryan or Mark or Lance –
D: Let’s just get on the train and go to the ballpark.
M: I’m ready!
D: With a Perspective, I’m Debbie Duncan.
M: And I’m Molly Duncan Stone.
D & M: Play ball!